What Are You Avoiding That You Should Be Addressing
I’m halfway through teaching a training series focusing on getting and giving more constructive feedback at work.
Whether you are a manager who gives a lot of feedback or someone who receives it from your own boss or peers, I'm sure you'd agree that everyone could stand to be a bit better at it.
One of the hurdles that get in the way of giving feedback is having the courage to give it in the first place.
As part of this training series, I shared a worksheet where the attendees mark all the reasons they tend to avoid or procrastinate in giving feedback. Download it here.
Some reasons include:
I secretly hope it will just go away (that's me 🙋♀️)
I don’t want to hurt their feelings
I’m worried about how they might respond
I don’t have time (anyone?)
For any number of reasons, we often hesitate to step into the discomfort that surrounds feedback conversations.
Welp, not sure how that helps us at work.
Feedback is the key to unlocking your team’s potential. As leaders and HR professionals, we understand that our best selves emerge when we receive constructive guidance from those who see our impact and care enough to help us grow. The same holds true for the people on our teams.
When you avoid giving feedback, you’re letting employees continue behaviors that may not serve them—or their careers. It’s your responsibility to address issues and help them improve, for their benefit and the organization’s success.
What are you avoiding that you should be addressing?
WHAT THIS MEANS FOR HR DIRECTORS
I read this somewhere: "What's hardest to say is often what needs to be most said."
For HR leaders, facilitating a culture of effective feedback is essential. The most difficult conversations are often the most important ones for driving personal and professional development. By supporting managers in delivering feedback, you play a key role in ensuring employees gain the insight they need to succeed—not just in their current role, but throughout their careers.
Feedback conversations have the potential to shape someone's career trajectory. The feedback you help managers give today can influence an employee’s performance in future roles, at future companies. That’s the power of well-delivered, timely feedback.
If managers are avoiding feedback conversations, encourage them to reflect on why. Ask, "Why am I hesitating here?" and then counter with, "How impactful could this feedback be for their future?" Focusing on the potential positive outcomes can provide the courage needed to initiate these conversations.
A Few Tips for Managers (That HR Can Support):
Shift the Focus to Benefits: Encourage managers to identify 2-3 specific benefits the employee will gain from receiving the feedback. Helping managers focus on the value of feedback for the employee can shift the mindset from avoidance to action.
Use Standards to Guide Feedback: Encourage leaders to compare behaviors to clear, pre-established standards. By setting expectations ahead of time, feedback becomes easier to deliver and helps build a culture of continuous improvement. HR can help ensure these standards are communicated across teams.
Reflect on Impactful Feedback: Have managers think about feedback they’ve received that made a difference in their own careers. What was it about those situations that made the feedback resonate and spur growth? Helping managers draw from personal experiences can equip them with empathy and insight for their own feedback conversations.
By fostering a culture where feedback is encouraged and embraced, HR plays a critical role in the development of both leaders and employees. Effective feedback isn’t just about addressing what’s wrong—it’s about empowering people to become the best version of themselves.
Want more help on this topic? Here's a link to a longer video training on giving and receiving feedback.
About The Author
For the past two decades, Cecilia Gorman has helped advertising agencies and other creatively-minded companies fix costly communication and productivity issues by teaching managers how to become better connectors, motivators, and leaders. Cecilia is the author of Always Believe In Better, creator of the digital learning course for managers—Manager Boot Camp, and co-founder of the global training and support community for working women—Empowership.
Interested in growing your skills as a manager? Check out how Manager Boot Camp might help.